Long night at work

It was an awfully long night. I ALMOST beat my record of most customers all on my own. I think I was only one or two people away. Maybe if I had helped the guy who walked in right as I was closing or the people who knocked on the door begging to get in 10 minutes after I closed. Seriously guys, did you need chocolate bad enough that you had to injure your pride by begging outside a locked chocolate store? And this isn't the first time. Its just a different group of people.

Customers make things very uncomfortable sometimes. Its part of the effect of working next to multiple bars. However not every crazy customer is drunk. In fact, most are not. For example:

Me: Hi would you two like some samples? We have vanilla peanut butter fudge and old fashioned fudge.

Female customer: Sure!

Male customer: I'll take old fashioned. I'm more of an old fashioned guy.

Female: really? Then why'd we sleep together on the first date?

Me: *stare at sample plate intensely while rewrapping it in saran wrap and while I pretended to be selectively deaf*

Female to me: that didn't really happen

Male: *thinks to the past with confused face* it didn't did it? Hmm

me: *what!!!?*

really? who says that in front of a complete stranger? or how about the customers a couple weeks ago who were drunk and decided to air hump each other while I grabbed their candy. gross! have some decency and modesty people!

New topic: This town needs a parking garage. I don't like parking 4 blocks away whenever there is some random event which is like every other weekend during the summer. Thank goodness I have pepper spray, my key knuckle strategy, and my call a friend defense. haha! Oh come on its just Paso I know but you can never be too safe. And I stopped with the key knuckles after I got pepper spray (I hold my keys between my knuckles so if I have to throw a punch its going to hurt a bit more than my weak lack of strength).

I'm bored so another new topic: Anybody remember YEARS ago when there was that summer filled with crickets galore? I specifically remember walking around the fair with them jumping everywhere and a guy picking one up and eating it. I also remember walking into the Burger King bathroom and there being at least 4 in there. I consider that to be "The Summer of the Crickets." Well I officially consider this *drumroll* "The Summer of the Pincher Bugs." It started with a bake fest at Noelle's where they hid in the rose petals which is natural. Not dying is not natural. Then they were in my bathroom later that day. Then in the sink a few days later. Then the shower a few days in a row. Randomly crawling out from under a plate tonight. Its getting scary. Is this a plague?

Alright I'm done now. Goodnight all... or just Noelle since she's probably the only one who will be reading this. Farewell all... I need to come up with an epic sign off phrase. Give me some time